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Saturday, January 12, 2008

THE FRIDAY NIGHT THAT WENT "SEW" BAD!!!!

They Say a picture can say a thousand words, but looking at the following images there is about 1 million words that are missing. It all occurred on Friday the 11th of January, and I was looking forward to a brilliant night of fun. It would start out at Outback Steakhouse with the family, and end bringing out the ancient sewing machine from the garage, and making homemade aprons with my best friend Mary. Sounds enlightening right? Well all I can say is that saying that it went haywire, would be an understatement.
"A ruffled mind makes a restless pillow." - Charlotte Bronte
ACT I

Hayden, Hayley, and Mary

Wynter and James

Above are pictures of loving family members, and my friend Mary. We all are smiling, but I would like to share the secret tale that these pearly whites don't quite unfold. We were having a marvelous dinner, when all of the sudden politics were brought up. I simply made a statement that I was disappointed that Richardson dropped out of the election, because even though he didn't have a chance my fingers were crossed in his direction.

My sister is a pure blooded Republican, and was mortified when she found out I was routing for a Democrat. I tried to explain to her that I was more of a centrist, but she went off on how the only way is the Republican way.

As I was being lectured I noticed that a piece of steak that I had just swallowed did not go all the way down. I still was breathing, but for some reason my esophagus was hanging on to the bite with all its might...it was dang good steak. I excused myself to the ladies room in hopes that standing up might make it go down. When I arrived the restroom was over crowded, and the steak lodged in my throat was making me very uncomfortable.

When I went back to the table it was worse than ever. I kept muttering silent prayers in my head, and hoping that I wouldn't pass out anytime soon. Everyone was finished with dinner and I only had enjoyed a couple of bites and one big bite that was currently just hanging out in my throat. My sister kept lecturing me, my body felt as if it was burning up, the room was spinning, and it was time to get out of there, and fast.

I sprinted away from the table, got outside, and was about about 10 feet away from the front door, when my greedy esophagus decided it was time to humiliate me even more. Future Outback customers surrounded me, and I couldn't stop puking. Even though, I finally felt like I was okay, my pride was definitely hurt!


I quickly called my dad, because I bolted out of the restaurant with no explanation. Wynter thought I left because I was sick of her Republican debate, my dad thought I was upset because he was only paying attention to Wynter's Democrat Con list that was about 5 miles long. This definitely wasn't the case.

ACT II
Mary and I decided that we would go buy our apron fabric. We found some fabric at Wal*Mart for only $1 a yard, and we were hip hip hooraying all the way home.


We cut out the pieces of our fabric, and as you can tell we were all smiles. We started sewing, pressing, and following the pattern, when we realized that we had no idea what we were doing. After working about 4 hours on our apron, talking about how we should start an E-bay apron making business, and listening to the best of Sheryl Crow, we decided we were ready for bed.



The following morning we woke up, and started trying to fix the thousands of sewing mistakes from the night before. Our aprons were looking like something a homeless woman would wear on a romantic Tuesday night.

I stopped following the pattern, and I started making up my own rules on how to make an apron. Mary, who has had the nick name of Martha Stewart in the past, couldn't help herself by doing every step wrong. We finally decided to combine our apron into one. We both decided that the E-bay business idea was flying out the window at a very rapid speed, and that maybe someday we would just go out and buy cute aprons. Here is the the result. It looks much better in the picture than it does in real life. Anyone interesting in purchasing an apron?
it's going fast!


2 comments:

Angie said...

Oh dear sounds like quite a night! Hasn't that food thing happened to you before? I swear I've heard you tell a story similar...I think your "combined" apron looks really good though!

Yelyah's Corner said...

NO...Like I said it looks really good in the picture!